I haven’t exactly “fit in” in nearly everything I’ve done, jobs I’ve had, social groups, and so on. I have three reasons for this. One, I’m just too different from people/groups etc and just can’t find common ground. Two, I believe I won’t fit in and ostracize myself so I’m on the outside looking in (like it’s my problem as to why I don’t fit in!). Three, I haven’t found my place yet.
All of these have a thread of truth in them. I’ve spent a lifetime never really belonging in social groups. Always standing off to the side, watching. Possibly, I was sitting there making up new characters for my stories, because I’m a writer — writers are generally known for spending much of their time alone writing.
But, as a writer if you want to publish and become successful, you have to be social and build a social media platform. You have to put yourself out there and make friends, maybe some enemies too. You put on your marketing hat and adapt an outgoing personality to reach your goals. Honestly, I have no idea how I can do that. I’m an emotional person, I hide away and watch, and I’m scared to be out in the line of fire.
The only thing that keeps me going is that passion for writing. I can make something do the things I don’t know how to do nor have a desire to do let alone the fortitude. But I want something. I have a passion. I’ll walk through my fears to reach it. Nothing else is quite as satisfying as writing novels, or fits who I am. I may try my hand at other things to put food on the table, but ultimately writing is the real deal for me. I’ve only scratched the surface on what holds me back as a writer.
What about you? Are there things that hold you back in your pursuit for your career path?